Quotables #66: I Have This Theory

Quotables #66: I Have This Theory
Theories are ways we try to explain events and experiences in our lives, and while some of them don't have merit, they can still be wildly entertaining. All of the following snippets of dialogue involve speculative characters. Your job is to guess what movies they're from.
Man:	Now, remember, according to my theory, you interfered with your parents' first meeting. If they don't meet, they won't fall in love, they won't get married, and they won't have kids. That's why your older brother's disappearing from that photograph. Your sister will follow, and unless you repair the damage, you'll be next.
Boy:	Sounds pretty heavy.
Man:	Weight has nothing to do with it.
Movie 1:

Man:	The Warren Commission thought they had an open-and-shut case. Three bullets, one assassin. But two unpredictable things happened that day that made it virtually impossible: One, the eight-millimeter home movie taken by Abraham Zapruder while standing by the grassy knoll; two, the third wounded man, James Tague, who was nicked by a fragment, standing near the triple underpass. The time frame, 5.6 seconds, determined by the Zapruder film, left no possibility of a fourth shot. So the shot or fragment that left a superficial wound on Tague's cheek had to come from the three shots fired from the sixth floor depository. That leaves just two bullets. And we know one of them was the fatal head shot that killed Kennedy. So now a single bullet remains. A single bullet now has to account for the remaining seven wounds in Kennedy and Connelly. But rather than admit to a conspiracy or investigate further, the Warren Commission chose to endorse the theory put forth by an ambitious junior counselor, Arlen Spector, one of the grossest lies ever forced on the American people. We've come to know it as the "Magic Bullet Theory." This single-bullet explanation is the foundation of the Warren Commission's claim of a lone assassin. Once you conclude the magic bullet could not create all seven of those wounds, you'd have to conclude that there was a fourth shot and a second rifle. And if there was a second rifleman, then by definition, there had to be a conspiracy.
Movie 2:

Man:	David Berkowitz, Ted Bundy, Richard Speck.
Woman:	What about them?
Man:	Serial killers. Serial killers only have two names. You ever notice that? But lone gunmen assassins, they always have three names. John Wilkes Booth, Lee Harvey Oswald, Mark David Chapman.
Woman:	John Hinckley. He shot Reagan. He only has two names.
Man:	Yeah, but he only just shot Reagan. Reagan didn't die. If Reagan had died, I'm pretty sure we probably would all know what John Hinckley's middle name was.
Movie 3:

Man #1:	I've got a new theory about marriage. Two people are in love, they live together, and then suddenly one day, they run out of conversation.
Man #2:	Uh-huh.
Man #1:	Totally. I mean they can't think of a single thing to say to each other. That's it: panic! Then suddenly it - it occurs to the chap that there is a way out of the deadlock.
Man #2:	Which is?
Man #1:	He'll ask her to marry him.
Man #2:	Brilliant! Brilliant!
Man #1:	Suddenly they've got something to talk about for the rest of their lives.
Man #2:	Basically you're saying marriage is just a way of getting out of an embarrassing pause in conversation.
Man #1:	The definitive icebreaker.
Movie 4:

Man #1:	[Name deleted], do you realize that in addition to fluoridating water, why, there are studies underway to fluoridate salt, flour, fruit juices, soup, sugar, milk... ice cream. Ice cream, [name deleted], children's ice cream.
Man #2:	Lord, Jack.
Man #1:	You know when fluoridation first began?
Man #2:	I... no, no. I don't, Jack.
Man #1:	1946. 1946, [name deleted]. How does that coincide with your post-war Commie conspiracy, huh? It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual. Certainly without any choice. That's the way your hardcore Commie works.
Man #2:	Uh, Jack, Jack, listen, tell me, tell me, Jack. When did you first... become... well, develop this theory?
Man #1:	Well, I, uh... I first became aware of it, [name deleted], during the physical act of love.
Man #2:	Hmm.
Man #1:	Yes, a, uh, a profound sense of fatigue... a feeling of emptiness followed. Luckily I... I was able to interpret these feelings correctly. Loss of essence.
Man #2:	Hmm.
Man #1:	I can assure you it has not recurred, [name deleted]. Women, uh... women sense my power, and they seek the life essence. I, uh... I do not avoid women, [name deleted].
Man #2:	No.
Man #1:	But I... I do deny them my essence.
Movie 5: